What do you write with?

My right hand.

Do you use a computer?

Yes. How else could I shop on eBay?

Who are your influences?

S.J. Perelman, Robert Benchley, Dave Barry and Mad Magazine.

In that order?

Yes. Unless you are Dave Barry.

What is the last book you read?

The Yellow Pages. I live in an old house.

Where do you get your ideas?

They are flown in daily from an idea farm in rural Minnesota. I believe in buying American.

As a writer, do you ever find yourself stuck?

Only if there's an ice storm. (See previous question.)

What advice do you have for beginning writers?

Don't name me as one of your influences.